Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
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