I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
