I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
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Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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