Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
What a fucking waste of an outfit
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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