For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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