I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
