i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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