If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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