Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
