I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
