She went from zero to smokin in five shots
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize