I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
as a side note pls kill me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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