A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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