I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
