why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
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