I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
