Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
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