It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
