so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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