Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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