I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
