you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
