Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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