Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I love you. Go after that dick
I came so hard my ears popped.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
