So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
someone owes me an orgasm
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Randomize
