She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
