I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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