Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
