blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize
