Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
