I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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