if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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