I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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