One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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