Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
