Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
