Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
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Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
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I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny