let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
this is an emotional support booty call
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
