genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Blow job season was short but glorious.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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