so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
