i think i have herpe
just one?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
