dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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