We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i will never coherently bang her
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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