So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
