I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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