Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
There are leaves in my underwear?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
