my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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