I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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