My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
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Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
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just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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