Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
